The 15 Men You’ll Meet on Dating Apps

Ever joined a dating app? We’ve identified 15 types of men you’re bound to meet…


Teenage couple using smartphones in the city park

  1. The cryptic – He posts one ultra pretentious quote or statement on his profile in an attempt to make you think he’s a deep thinker. Luckily we’re not so easily fooled!
  1. The emoticon overuser – One or two maybe, but every other word? You can have too much of a good thing…
  1. The topless selfie lover – AKA, body and self obsessive. He’ll be too busy admiring himself to notice how great you look.
  1. The overachiever – He’s got an amazing job, has travelled the world, does the Iron Man every weekend, blah blah. We already feel inadequate.
  1. The historian – Fascinating to see what he looked like 10 years ago, but how about an up-to-date shot?
  1. The too good to be true boy – Surrounded by images of cute dogs, adoring children, loved up mates, surely he’s not for real?
  1. The faceless guy – Without a picture he has no hope of securing a (decent) date. Anyway, what is he trying to hide?
  1. The ex-files man – Pictures with his old girlfriend? Doesn’t he have any mates?
  1. The bio light – Writing a biog is awkward – we know we’ve been there. But he should at least give it a try!
  1. The Unicorn – His life is so amazing and perfect, so why is he on a dating app anyway?
  1. The All Action Hero – You’ll find him on a yacht sailing the Solent or skiing down a mountain in the Alps. Doesn’t he ever just go to the pub for a drink on a weekend?
  1. One Word Responder – Giving short replies to our insightful questions. Really? More effort required otherwise any date is going to be most painful.
  1. The Shady One – Sunglasses are a cool fashion accessory we admit, but as a main profile shot they are hiding the windows to his soul…
  1. The Health Nut – Those protein shakes and daily runs are most impressive but we don’t want to be made to feel guilty when we spend Sunday slobbing around in our PJs, eating ice cream and binge-watching Scandal.
  1. The Early Sexter – He could at least wait until we’ve been on a date before the naughty messaging gets started. Cheeky!